People who meet Sandy Bristow recognize immediately that she is all about other people. Strong to her core, she has a long history of helping others. A trained minister, she’s made her home a safe-haven for those who seek her out.
She called me a few months ago with a story to tell. She’d heard about the work we are doing on Fireside Talk Radio to give folks tools to talk about difficult topics. In Sandy’s case she wanted other women to know the nature of sexual assault. We both want to put a dent in the devil’s aggressive, hostile attacks of violence toward women and men.
In an episode we called Intuition and Safety: Trusting Our Gut When it Says Sexual Predator, this highly educated, gifted counselor shares her personal experience of being attacked by a trusted health professional, a chiropractor. She offers the legal definition of sexual assault. As she succinctly sums up God’s love of justice, Sandy shares one profound insight after another. If you or someone you love has been fondled, groped, or raped, her wisdom will equip you to seek justice.
She shared how perpetrators are “lording it over their victims. In her case, when she called on the Lord’s name, the predator released her. Traumatized, she realized that not everyone is so fortunate. When she tried to report the assault initially, the governing board dismissed her. Because of her extensive education, though, Sandy understands the science behind sexual addiction. Therefore, out of compassion, she filed an official complaint that is now being investigated.
Sexual addictions, like all forms of addictions, progress to more dangerous forms of stimulation, she explains. This creates a dangerous environment for women whether it’s at home or work.
“God gave us an instinct. We are created to have an inner knowing. God gave us (believers) His Holy Spirit.” Even so, she explains that because God is a God of justice, His justice is foreign to our way of thinking.
“We’re looking for fairness. We’re looking for revenge,” she chuckles. Instead, we need to trust Him for the highest and best justice. Only then can we experience all God has planned for us.
The most important thing after sexual assault is healing for the victim. In a second episode called Intuition and Safety: The Value of Intuition and Healing in Community, she explains that most women who’ve experienced sexual assault have a form of PSTD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. The brain is actually damaged by the trauma. Since the statute of limitations is 5 years on sexual assault, it’s important to seek help right away.
“Healing happens in community, not isolation,” even though your instincts tell you to isolate, she says, “Isolation is where the devil takes you to go in for the kill.”
You’ll find more of Sandy’s wisdom on my website.
Cathy Primer Krafve, aka Checklist Charlie, lives and writes with a Texas twang. Contact her at CathyKrafve.com.